I Lost Jesus’ Birthday Cake Under the Appetizers.

This is not meant to be depressing; rather my attempt to give you an opportunity to, if need be, learn from my mistakes.

     It started like this… in December of 2010, two weeks before Christmas, I had started going back to school. A flurry of administrative activities, resulting from my new academics, and a rushed exam consumed all my time. In the back of my mind I worried that my children were missing the joys of the season. The usual build up of excitement was missing. Comments reached my ears from my children  

“It doesn’t feel like Christmas”.

It was as if they knew something was out of place, not right with the joy of the season, but they couldn’t put their fingers on what it was.

      Guilt would assail me each time I would pass our advent calendar. 1 week behind. ….. 2 weeks behind …… later I told myself, I would have time to celebrate Christmas later. There was still opportunity to catch up.

     My school wrapped up. However, instead of slowing down to enjoy the season with my family, I took up another task. Preparing for our annual Christmas party!

Off I went again! This time consumed with baking and cooking.

Just one more batch… will there be enough?

      It was while I was driving my kids in the car, listening to a child’s story on the radio, that it hit me. Beautiful strains of Hark the Harold Angels Sing and Emmanuel filled my car. It was as if the Lord reached down, in the middle of my frantic pace, and touched my heart,

    “ This is how much I love you, I sent my Son for you.”

   Tears filled my eyes. Gratitude that I had not felt in a long while overwhelmed me.

     “Oh my Lord, I’ve missed it. The whole point of Christmas. How could I have let this happen?”

     All I wanted to do was get off the treadmill and worship, just worship. To thank my Lord and Father for his gift so incredibly special, so beautiful, for me, for everyone.

  I wish I could say that I turned over a new leaf at that point. How I slowed down, that my party was filled with thanksgiving to Him. Not to the food.

I couldn’t do it. I failed completely. Not only did I become an incredibly angry, busy mother hours before the party, reducing my children to tears.  I managed to convey to my family. Those I love most. That this was MY special day, and that they should support and help with the party for ME.  I had managed to convince my family that we were celebrating Jesus’ birthday for me. In tears, I realized I had gotten so sucked into the pace of entertaining that I had pulled my family's attention off the season and onto me.

   Hot, fresh appetizers were rotated around to my guest all evening, but I forgot to thaw the boxed birthday cake I had made for the children. I couldn’t get off the treadmill I had been running on. The worship at the party was limp at best; a dear friend stepped in to save the day and lead singing. However I had rushed the song sheets and Santa songs just didn’t cut it.  All I wanted at that time was to fill my home with adoration and thanksgiving for the miracle of Jesus’ birth.

I felt like I had prepared Jesus’ birthday party for Him but had forgotten to bring a present. Worse. I had forgotten to invite Him.

I don’t want to leave my readers on a down note, the rest of the season picked up from there. I slowed down. My family came together and we enjoyed our time over the following week.

This year has been different for us. So far our home is only partially decorated and we don’t have a tree up. This will come, but I am not rushing it.  But family, friends and time to be excited about the season is growing in our home. My hope is that those that come to my home this year find a place of thankfulness and adoration. I still get wrapped up in business, but I am watching for it and I slow down a lot sooner. My guests, whoever they may be this year, will…. I hope, find Peace ,Joy and His love at our home. Less fresh appetizers, a homemade birthday cake, and a very present guest of honor.

Blessings to you all!

Christine